This statement was made by one of my oldest online friends, Ketutar Jensen, who is herself married to a transgender man, Henric C. Jensen.

First she linked to an op-ed piece attacking transgender women:

The Trans Ego: Why Allies are Becoming TERFs

And this was Ketutar’s response:

The validation of a transperson is important.

 

It doesn’t mean the transperson is free to commit violence, abuse, crimes, rape also.

 

I am more concerned about the fact that women are raped in prison, than by whom they are raped by.

 

Transgender women in male prisons are in higher risk of getting raped than women in female prisons. I would not put a transwoman in male prison just because some shitty bitches think she’s a man.

 

The validation of a transperson is important.

 

The protection of women is also important.

 

It should be possible to satisfy both needs at the same time.

 

If a woman in women’s shelter gets triggered because another woman in the same shelter reminds her of her abuser, which one do you think needs to leave the shelter? Which one needs more protection? You have two women who have been abused. One of them is fine with living with the other women in the shelter, doesn’t abuse anyone, doesn’t threaten anyone, all she has against her is that she reminds another woman of their abuser. Yes, I would say the peaceful woman should stay and the aggressive woman who gets “triggered” should get a special attention with psychological care, maybe even an asylum, so that she can deal with her trauma. Shelters are needed, and everyone in there must understand and accept that everyone accepted in is in need of the shelter. Everyone in the shelter should do their best to live in peace with their fellow women, and not get “concerned” because some of these fellow women are trans.

 

25% of ciswomen are victims of domestic violence.

 

50% of transwomen are victims of domestic violence.

 

1 of 6 ciswomen have been sexually assaulted.

 

1 of 2 transwomen have been sexually assaulted.

 

I think it’s obvious who is the victim here.

 

“Transphobic bitch deserves to be beat, right?”

Of course they don’t. But you are still a transphobic bitch, and it’s not OK. Stop it. Stop with the logical fallacies. Stop the exaggeration, oversimplifying, slippery slope, and all the others.

You are hurting people!

 

If you don’t want to have sex with a transwoman, don’t have sex with a transwoman. If people call you transphobe for that, let them. Big deal.

But if you are a transphobe, own it. You ARE a transphobe. If you don’t like being called that, don’t be a transphobe. Easy as that.

 

“As long as that male states, “I am woman,” he is believed and allowed in.”

Bullshit.

 

Yes, transpeople matter. Transpeople matter more than transphobes’ feelings. Every person matters more than bigoted xenophobes’ feelings.

 

“bullied those who still said female genital mutilation, pregnant woman, and dared speak about vaginas”

Who did? How? When, where, why?

 

I am 100% certain of that if you believe this to be true, you have misunderstood something, or you are referring to some single incident, that cannot possibly be taken as a rule.

 

Maybe you referred to a transman who was pregnant as woman? Because you simply cannot twist your mind around the fact that one’s biology and one’s gender identity can be two different things. Because you cannot fathom how a person could possibly know they are men, when they have functional wombs, or know they are women, when they have functional penises.

 

You speak about harmful traditional gender roles, about the need of women to be protected against these societal gender based expectations, about the equality of sexes, of us being humans, yet you hang the title, the role, the name, the status, on the female genitals.

 

*sigh* Speak about female physiognomy. But mind why you do that, and what conclusions you draw on it. Women can rape as well as men can. Women can abuse as well as men can. Women can and have harmed their fellow women in shelters and jails and every “women only” “safe” place all over the world. Girls have been raped by their cunt bearing “sisters” in school restrooms and dressing rooms. More cis women have been harmed by cis women than trans women.

 

Transwomen have all the right to speak about women’s rights as ciswomen. No-one has said they have more right. They don’t have less right either.

 

In sports… they do not have the same right to participate as ciswomen.

Are you perhaps referring to Caster Semenya? She is a woman. She was identified as girl at birth, raised as a girl, identifies as a female. She just happens to be intersexed, and therefore have more testosterone than other women. This gives her an advantage in sporting. But she is still a woman.

 

Women’s places in politics? Of course. They are women. There is about 1-2 % of transwomen among all the women in the world, and if one of them is good enough to get a place in politics, good for her, I say. The more women in politics, the better it is for women. I’d rather have a sane transwoman in politics than an insane ciswoman.

 

The same goes for everything else where there is a gender quota. I believe a transwoman can speak for me just as much as a ciswoman can. As said, there aren’t that many transwomen in the world, so that ciswomen need to be scared of them “coming and taking our jobs!!!” There’s more “illegal aliens” than transpeople, and I HOPE you realize how ridiculous all the white people whining about them are. You are just as ridiculous whining about losing your place to transwomen. Ridiculous and pitiful.

 

Transwomen are not men. Transmen are not women.

No-one has been sacrificed, except you expect people to sacrifice the transpeople.

 

It’s not a question of mattering MORE. It’s a question of mattering.

Black Lives Matter. Transpeople Matter. Neither of those mean that white lives don’t matter or that women don’t matter. You know – at least I HOPE you know what’s wrong with “all lives matter”.

 

Then comes the nasty part here… It sounds like the whine I have read by white supremists talking about how colored people have aspirations. How they should know their place and stay there. How dare they assume they should have the same rights and privileges as white people? Word after word it’s the exact same rhetoric.

 

Should I call these people female supremacists in stead of TERFs? They are both.

 

How dare transpeople DEMAND to be seen as human beings?

 

So, what is a woman? Having female reproductive organs? Cunt bearing citizen? To me being a woman is more than that. Having a womb, vulva, vagina is irrelevant.

 

There was once an episode of Star Trek the Next Generation where they discussed whether Data was a person or a machine. “Biologically” he was a machine, but in reality, by all standards that matter, he was a person.

It’s the same thing here. Biologically, transwomen are male, by all standards that really matter they are women.

 

Which means that they do deserve everything cis women “deserve”.

They aren’t taking anything away. They aren’t “keeping their male privilege”. It is more like a conversion.

 

I don’t think a lot of people call vaginas “front holes”. If they do, they probably call their own that as well.

 

You were never an ally. You never saw transwomen as women. To you they were probably just some sort of LGBTQ+ creature you could “support”, you know, like pets. As long as they stayed in their place. Your alliance was always conditional.

 

My alliance is unconditional. I am prepared to fight for all women’s rights to women’s spaces, transwomen as well as ciswomen. And all men’s rights to men’s spaces as well.

 

Because that’s the right thing to do. Because that’s the human thing to do. Because I would be just a piece of shit if I didn’t, and I don’t want to be a piece of shit. Like you.

 

I am not prepared to support anyone bitching about dating options, because nobody has all the dating options. I wouldn’t date a lesbian, because I am straight. Nothing against lesbians, I’m just not attracted to them. I wouldn’t date 90% of world’s straight male population in eligible age either. I would never date Donald Trump for example. I’m just not attracted to them. So why would you bitch about someone you are interested in not being interested in you? There are enough lesbians who don’t care if a woman is cis or trans so that lesbian transwomen can date. (Frankly, I find lesbian ciswomen saying transwomen are disgusting stupid. I’m a straight woman married to a transman, and he is just as much man as any other man I have met. Yes, it is just bigotry. Now, it’s ok for you to be bigoted. Denying your bigotry is stupid, though.)

I will fight for everyone’s right for healthcare, and respect.

I will fight against violence with anyone.

 

I am prepared to call anyone anything they wish to be called. It’s no skin off my nose. He, she, they, e, man, woman, an, person, what ever.

You see, transwomen don’t want to take anything yours. They don’t want to deny your rights. That we include transwomen in the sisterhood, motherhood, womanhood, doesn’t take anything away from you. No-one expected you to hand over anything of yours. There isn’t some limited amount of spots in womanhood ciswomen have to fight transwomen for. There is room for everyone. It’s not a pie, remember.

 

I haven’t lost anything by accepting transwomen as women. Not a thing.

No TERFs started as allies. You always excluded transwomen from women. You are so angry, because you are a TERF.

 

“But women talk in the shadows about the truth.”

*sigh* You know, when you start talking like Alt-Right assholes, you might need to check your values and attitudes, because that language is the symptom of xenophobia, chauvinism, elitism, bigotry, supremism, oppression. There is just enough truth in your words to make your propaganda effective. Most of it is twisted, exaggerated, misleading, mispresenting facts, omitting important information, social control, fear mongering… ugh.

 

Of course one cannot change one’s biological “sex”. Which is why we speak of gender.

 

When it comes to bodies, it’s fairly easy to get the look right. What people have in their pants is none of my business, and I find it rather concerning that you think it’s all that matters.

 

Of course one can never live the experience of being born female, but – seriously – what is that? If you treat your female babies differently from your male babies, stop it immediately. Frankly, if you treat females differently from males, stop it immediately. Any and every “experience of being born female/male” is just societal conditioning and programming, and that, my dear, is easy to “mimic”, imagine, identify with. I haven’t experinced half the things most women have, all women haven’t experienced what I have – the “female experience” is different for everyone. The only thing transwomen never experience is menstruation, and not all ciswomen experience it either. To most women it’s a minor nuisance if even less than that. To some women it’s a major handicap. So what is this mythical “female experience” transwomen can never experience? Bullshit. Pure imaginary tool of oppression by sexist TERFs.

There is nothing wrong with admitting all women are different, and every woman and their experience of womanhood is unique.

 

All women are women, transwomen as well as ciswomen.

 

“But listen: We don’t tell anorexics that their body dysmorphia is right and that they are fat.”

This… this is so vile! It’s like saying homosexuality is a dysphoria and one just needs proper treatment to get over the mental disorder.

 

“We did not turn every restroom stall in the world into a disabled access stall.” Wouldn’t be a bad idea.

 

“We don’t force people to fuck incels.” Of course we don’t. No-one is asking you to.

 

“We didn’t ban peanuts from existence when many people became deathly allergic.” What is this referring to? Because it sounds like you are trying to force people to eat peanuts even though they are allergic to them, just because you find it offensive that someone can’t eat Snickers and it’s your favorite.

 

“We did not allow Rachel Dolezal to claim trans-racial.”

That’s a whole another can of worms.

 

“And we shouldn’t be forced to sacrifice the needs and issues and concerns and spaces of 50% of the population for your minuscule, undefinable group.”

There is no need for that either. Including the “minuscule group” (it’s not undefinable, and has never been. You just don’t accept the definition.) doesn’t harm, limit, damage, sacrifice, eliminate, or cancel the needs, issues, concerns, or spaces of women.

 

Transwomen would “fit in the norms” just fine, if they were allowed to. It’s nothing in them that makes things hard. It’s you. There is NOTHING in being a woman, that would be in any way diminished, limited, harmed by including transwomen as women. Not one of the transwomen I know is in any way distinguishable from the ciswomen I know, other than they are all individuals. Not one of the transmen I know is in any way distinguishable from the cismen I know, other than they are all individuals.

 

Whom ever they have “managed to piss off” would get pissed off by anything. They probably get pissed off a lot, by different insignificant, stupid issues.

 

It IS transphobic to tell a transwoman you aren’t interested in her because you don’t think she’s a woman. You could just as well say you aren’t interested in her. Nothing offensive in that. No need to drag in her gender to it.

 

I am not the least offended, worried or threatened by transgendered women sharing “my spaces”. The women who are so damaged they need to be sheltered against anything that reminds them of men have safe spaces where transwomen aren’t welcome. Not even butchy ciswomen. Not even if they are related or friends, and can prove it. Not even boy children. So demanding that transwomen have to be excluded from all shelters forces them into men’s shelters, where they continue being in danger, and where they would be taking place from a man in need of a shelter, AND THERE ARE VERY FEW SHELTERS FOR MEN, AND EVEN THESE FEW HAVE TO FIGHT FOR EXISTENCE, BECAUSE OF WOMEN DEMANDING ALL SHELTERS TO BE CISWOMEN ONLY… so where would these transwomen go? Considering that you think you have had to fight to get women’s shelters, how probable do you think transwomen would get any? And for how long do you think it would be allowed to exist, before some woman demands it has to be given to REAL women, who are the REAL victims in this world, and not to some “men wearing a woman costume”, like J.K.Rowling so eloquently stated it.

 

There is no “trans lobby” trying to convince children that they are trans. Geesh, you sound like Christians screaming about gay agenda! Most children know already as toddlers what gender they are, if they are of any gender. The “fashion trend” of teenagers wondering if they are transgendered has nothing to do with transgendered people. It exists because we are talking openly about trans issues, but not openly enough, as most people – YOU INCLUDED – don’t have a clue of what it really is. If a girl is fine with being a girl, but finds the society’s expectations oppressing, and tries to find a way to be what they want to be, and believe life would be easier as a man, she isn’t a transman. She is a ciswoman finding the society’s expectations bla bla bla.

 

Medicalized puberty-blocking doesn’t leave children underdeveloped and sterile, but it shouldn’t be used nilly-willy. It isn’t difficult to figure out if the child really is a transperson or just unhappy with other things and expressing this unhappiness with a wish to change gender. A lot of children aren’t even aware of the diversity of sexuality and gender. I have met a lot of people who are overjoyed hearing about asexual people, or fluid gender identity, and all the other things.

 

Another thing that’s fashionable right now, is the “detransition hysteria”. People tell stories about transpeople who weren’t happy about the transition and wish to transition back, like they tell about young black men being criminals. One can prove anything with statistics.

 

And those “mere questions”? “Why don’t you smile more, you’d be prettier.” “When are you going to get married?” “Why do you call yourself feminist? You should call yourself something inclusive, like equalist” “Why isn’t feminism concerned about men? You do know it’s not all men, don’t you? Why do you hate men?” “It’s a joke, why are you so angry?”

 

“You’ve united women of color, white women, men, conservatives, liberals, moderates, lesbians, gay men, even de-transitioned trans people against you.

So well done.”

And that sounds somehow very similar to what people were saying to Feminists and Civil Rights Activists once upon a time. Or now.

 

“Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.”

And how have you been scorned? Check your privilege. If someone is “a woman scorned” here, it’s the transwomen. It’s they who are being treated with contempt and disdain, who are being rejected and refused.

 

Another interesting thing here is that quite a lot of feminists find the term “female” offensive. And then they define woman as female, by the biological, physiological aspect alone.

And I will add to that my own statement…..Allow me to introduce you to a character in a story:

https://choices-stories-you-play.fandom.com/wiki/Aisha_Bhatt

Aisha, a character in the Bachelorette Party book, is one of your best friends from college and one of your love interests. She is first seen in Chapter 1…..Aisha has tanned skin, brown eyes, and short black hair. In present day, her hair has a few purple streaks. She wears a black leather jacket and a silver top, combined with a black choker and a necklace…….In a flashback scene of Chapter 1, it is mentioned that she finally found the courage for her transition making her the second transgender Choices character, the first being Andy Kang from the It Lives series.

Bachelorette Party is a very female centered storyline and Aisha’s friends, even while knowing she is transgender, never, even for one second, treat her as any less of a woman than they themselves are. She dresses, talks, behaves, and looks totally like a beautiful woman……because she is one!